I quickly texted to my friend, “google landmark forum, is it a cult”?
I texted this line to a friend while sitting in the “introductory” session of the Landmark educational meeting. A friend had invited me, after telling me some of the good experiences she’d had. When she described it, it sounded like a combination of motivational coaching, business coaching and personal development. All good things I thought, and I’m always interested in “bettering” myself.
From the moment I walked in, I knew that this was not what I was expecting. I had brought work to do, planning to simply listen in on their meeting and get my work done (it still remains undone as I type this). The room was laid out like a church with pulpit almost, and as people strolled in the greetings were similar. Warm hugs, arm squeezes, even a tear or two.
I was quickly spotted as a visitor and many people came up to greet me. I began getting uncomfortable almost immediately and sent of the above text to my friend.
After introdcutions, the “guests” were whisked off to a separate room for a separate session. I was a little dissapointned as I’d come to sit in on the interesting information that my friend said they’d be covering (Brain science).
There were only 2 of us, plus a nice man with a nametag that read “Introduction Leader”, and an “introduction leader in training”. Wow…whatever this thing is…to need to have introduction leader’s in-trianing means that they’ve got a pretty big funnel of educational training for their “leaders”.
In the tiny room, our leader sat with a book stand next to him and his 3 ring binder with all the information he was supposed to cover with us. He led us through a not-uninteresting exercise, but clearly one with an specific motive…to get you to see how messed up you really are inside.
I am currently going through some business buildign activities, and I’ve been very proactive and trying to launch a new branch of my small business…making phone calls, gathering market information, etc. I picked this activity as my item to work on for the session. But this didn’t fit his model at all…the leader’s example of “what I’m already doing”, “what I already have”, and “what I’m already being”, were all negatives….his was also a business situation…what he was already doing was letting sales leads slip by, not closing calls and spending his time doing efforst that were not buildign the bottom line. What he was already being was…”selfish, irresponsible and close minded”. He said that the point of the last part was to really “tell one on yourself”.
HUH? What I was already being was forward thinking, proactive, seeking new education and opportunities…all good stuff…I just need to complete the last pieces of the puzzle to make it all a go.
If I didn’t already feel uncomfortable this was really starting to seem like an ill-intended, misguided effort at getting vulnarable people to sign up for an expensive course in self-help and common sense. Not that those are bad things, but having gone through a number of small business coaching sessions that were all quite helpful, as well as being in a business that helps others achieve things they never dreamed possible (completing a triathlon), I was very dissapointed at the Introduction Leader’s approach to “discovering possibilities”.
None of the introductory session was aimed at finding solutions…and I certainly wouldn’t expect to find a solution in 90 minutes to a large problem. Instead, it was devoted to giving you “carrots”, with examples of personal breakthroughs due to realizations of childhood traumas that have defined your personality to adulthood. (Things like being told by your school-age crush that you’re ugly, not being able to make final ammends with a deceased loved one, etc).
The suggestion taht every one has some childhood trauma causing limiting behaviors in adulthood I find very insulting. I live an examined life. I’ve overcome innumberable obstacles to get into medical school, become a physician, invest profitably, start a small business and help other people reach their goals. I constantly read business books looking for new, different and better ways to accomplish my goals.
At intermission, I tried to leave, by politely telling him that I was just going to wait in the lobby until my friend’s session was done. He turned bright read and got very fidgety. He said, “Before you decide to leave, can we have another conversation about this?” Man, was he desperate to have me stay in the room. I already knew that I was not interested in this thing, whatever it was (I still don’t know).
I took a break and did some pushups, handstands and planks in the hallway (I was missing valuable exercise time!!), and checked my cell phone. Not only did my friend text me back, but her boyfriend too. There on my blackberry, two texts one right above the other simply said, “CULT!” I laughed about it, knowing that somehow my instincts of “this just doesn’t feel right” were correct.
During the second portion ( I did decide to stay), we opened up a new pamphet, and I took the registration card out and obnoxiously tossed it in the air behind my chair, making a statement that yes, I am interested in being a better person…no, I am not going to sign up for the landmark forum tonight. Now what do you have to tell me?
I could paraphrase what he talked about in the 2nd half, and there was nothign inherently good or bad about the content…but I failed to see the connecting of how signing up for the landmark forum TONIGHT was going to be the only way I’d slove the puzzle of letting my past limit my future.
In the end…it was 3 hours wasted, and my work is still not done. But I felt compelled to share this with my readers and whomever else my stumble across it.
3 hours!!
Ahh, thank God you had that reaction, Doc! I saw the title of your post and my blood ran cold. Yeah, bigtime cult.
This is funny. I can relate to a fair bit of what you said. I went to an introduction session and had many of the thoughts you talked about here. I actually signed up, mostly because of my girlfriend, but to be honest, also a little bit because I was intrigued. I read a bunch of stuff on the web and while I saw most people raving about it, I saw the cult stuff and it concerned me. I expressed this concern and my second thoughts to my girl friend and she dismissed it. She is not stupid or gullable so I decided to continue to trust her and did the course and to be honest, it was actually good. I am not planning on doing other courses, but I can for sure say that the cult nonsense is just a bunch of rumors and BS. Some self righteous people got their undies in a bunch over nothing. tea bagger type hysteria. — My two cents. for whatever it is worth.
Your blog is great. Very refreshing to see a scientific approach to life’s hype. Keep it up!
Ahh, thank God you had that reaction, Doc! I saw the title of your post and my blood ran cold. Yeah, bigtime cult.
My best friend and her husband have gone through the Landmark Forum and found their lives enriched by it. Myself, I spent half the introductory session hiding in the bathroom with the same friend, utterly terrified and crying. I’ve got long-term emotional issues and they tripped every single one of my defense mechanisms. I think that their attraction lies in the healing power of confession and catharsis. When one goes through a catharsis, the emotional release imprints on the brain and people choose to continue with the Landmark training so they can get more of that good stuff. I think a person who is confident in him/herself and is willing to accept what the Forum has to offer will get a lot out of it. Myself, I found myself expected to tell too much Truth to a bunch of complete strangers that I didn’t know and had no reason to trust. It scared me silly. Fortunately, it was the impetus to get myself back into therapy, which is what I really needed. And my friend never tried to get me back.
I have two siblings who took this nonsense, and they always talk about how amazing it is and recommend it to other family members. I hope they just went to experience it, and will not be going back or recommending it to anyone else again. I don’t know what it is about this thing, but as soon as I walked into the ‘graduation’ (whatever it was), I immediately walked out. The volunteers were nice and all smiled, that was the only thing worth noting…
Good luck if you do decide to take it, but understand this is not your only choice. Do some research on it, and if you feel like its right for you, don’t let it take over your life.
THANKS FOR THIS>My best friend growing up disappeared off the radar for a few years. Showed up and invited me to see what he was up to. He was leading a Landmark group. I sat in the back, jaw on the floor. Total brainwash/psych101 babble. We lost touch again. He got in touch again after ten years. He has left Landmark and is now a born-again.
My ex-husband has recently become involved in this. Thank goodness he is out of state. He has been harassing me for weeks to share my “trauma” with him and join him in whatever this is. He doesn’t have a job. Somehow travels all over but not paying child support. I’m sure it’s all going to Landmark. I’m afraid of the long-term implications involving our daughter.
I am so glad I read your post. I am preparing to deliver introduction session, just like the one you attended, tomorrow.
and you may not even keep up with the blog any longer.
this post let me see into the listening of the audience. It’s very great to know what people in the introduction are thinking. We are attempting to deliver why this education is so profound, but because it is so different from anything else, it’s challenging to be on the point. The only way to find out what the course is for real is to take it (you can always get refund if you hate it).
i also attended introduction and left, also thinking it was not worth my time. and it so was.
respectfully irina, Introduction Leader
Old post… but a very ordinary response no matter the year it was posted… i see lots of negative responses to a program that no one took.
If i had a 3 hr description of a program like: Shalom, or the course in miracles, or maybe AA all being “transformative learning” (did the blogger realize that’s what he was investigating?) if during such an introduction i thought i was going to do some buisness work, id say first off there us likely an issue with my time scheduling in my buisness, anyway to enter a meeting with no idea what its about and set my self up with a preconceived notion that i already know what it is will almost guarantee i wont get it… and ill try to fit what i see into my preconceived ideas… this will most certainly close your learning off to new ideas that are not of your already knowing experience and anything that’s in your way as a way of being will remain, why would it transform? And as you entered the room So shall you leave the room with nothing learned, having felt you waisted your time… ie you were clearly not coachable nor open to transformation. And rather then seeing the introduction leader as a person who wants to share a way of seeing life vs someone who’s trying to.. I’m not sure what the fear is… it would make sense that you were not open to what they were offering you…
——
Ive watched maybe 7-8 introductions, done the courses, and i’ve had many transformative learning experiences in other areas…
The first thing id do if this interests you is understand that its not like anything!
You can not compare it to another program it wont fit!
The next thing us if your scared of the idea of a cult, id question that fear, and be clear what qualifies as “cult” look it up you’ll be surprised!
And you’ll be able to see how many cults you’ve likely already been in, regardless look at the fear in you! not someones idea of a cult for them… that’s a bit like trying to experience love through another person, and being an expert on it…
Anyway these types of blogs are the true waist of time and discredits a very profound and life changing program that causes many if not all its participants to find what they cane for.
I loved it! And i laugh at the cult fear, very funny idea….
John, thanks for your comments. Yes, this is an old post, but I think you’d agree that one person’s experience is as valid as another person’s experience even if they are complete opposites, given the same circumstances. On this occasion, I was invited by a friend to attend a lecture about “Neuroscience” and learning. This really intrigued me. When we arrived it was something quite different that I was not interested in. I did not attend in order to learn about the program. I was not told that I would be separated from my friend who invited me. I felt blindsided and felt like I was being coerced. If I were looking for a transformative experience or a “solution” to whatever problem I was having, that’s one thing. I was told were going to talk about the brain and instead was ushered into another room, away from my friend, with no ride home. These are strong tactics and designed to manipulate. I’m sure you can imagine a similar situation that you may have been in the past.